18 August 2008

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Dot with Julia and Allan Higbee, who we visited last Friday. My last night with a catheter – at least for a while. On Saturday I went back to Edgefield Ward for its removal, and after waiting the usual two hours-plus, this was done, painlessly, by an auxiliary called Wendy. And this time I performed perfectly acceptably afterwards and was allowed home. However, it came as a bit of a blow to discover that I would have to self-catheterise. It was slightly less of a blow when I discovered what this meant, and that I could do it fairly easily, but it would be nice to be free of the whole thing. However, the guys with me in the ward were in a far worse state generally, and remarkably cheerful. I felt a bit humbled really, but at the same time unjustifiably downcast. I think I was afraid of it all going wrong again. This feeling lasted overnight, but I am now more optimistic, although I do still have this odd, tight, heavy feeling in my abdomen which I would like to go away.

Went to church on Sunday and played guitar and led prayers: a good service led by Paul. Afterwards we had a quiet afternoon watching the Olympics.

Today I tried to get some extra sleep, but was unsuccessful, although I did actually stay in bed most of the morning. Again watched some Olympics, then went up to doctor’s to take note from hospital, and Dot called in at Garden Centre to get some oasis for our party next week. Afterwards I walked home from the Ketts Hill roundabout after posting some letters. Still get tired quickly. Dot is busy organising the tables for the 31st: she is doing a great job. I need to get on with writing my speech and organising the music.

16 August 2008

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Lucy Care, Caroline Gilfillan and Lisa D’Onofrio at Thursday’s Bally meeting to discuss various aspects of the Paston Book – running order, finance, exhibitions and so on. Annette was also there. More pictures on the InPrint website. The meeting lasted two hours and got a number of things sorted out, though some were left vague as usual.

I wasn’t feeling particularly well and eventually decided to go to the doctor’s with another urine infection. I was prescribed antibiotics by Dr Macris, who I hadn’t met before. To be fair, he probably hadn’t met me before either.

Yesterday Dot spent a long time in the city, with Carrie, who she met for lunch. I walked up to the newsagent’s and the sorting office (twice) – the second time to send off my Flip camcorder, which hasn’t been connecting to my computer properly. I had an e-mail exchange with the support team, who eventually told me to send it back to Windsor for repair or replacement. In late afternoon we called in at Dunston Hall to pay for our ruby celebration, then went on to Newton Flotman, where we had a Greek meal with the Higbees. Very enjoyable: Allan revealed that he had made some lovely wooden bowls, and he offered to make us one if we supplied the wood. Back home by just after 10pm.

In an hour’s time I will be at the hospital to have my catheter removed, which will be a relief. I’m a little bit tense of course, but hope that all will go well and I’ll be back home this evening.

13 August 2008

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Another picture from Sunday – this one is of our friends Bridget and David Archer, members of our Tuesday Group and just two of many who didn’t come last night, when we almost had an all-time low of three until Claire turned up late. Vicky was the other one, and the four of us had a very pleasant evening.

Earlier Dot and I had been out to Paston to deliver some acetates for Lucy. Jack was there, looking quite chirpy at 95, and so was Naomi, plus Lucy’s sister, niece, niece’s husband and great-nephew. So obviously we had a cup of tea and passed a pleasant half hour before departing for North Walsham to drop in on Jessie for another cup of tea. She had fallen over on some uneven pavement and had a few cuts, but seemed more or less OK. I instructed her not to do it again.

On the way home we saw evidence of the downpour that had swept across a narrow band of Norfolk in the morning and kept us in bed (well, it doesn’t take a downpour to keep us in bed, but it’s a good excuse). By afternoon it was was reasonably pleasant, but the showers have continued into today, and the forecast is not too wonderful.

According to my Norfolk Almanac of Disasters, nothing really bad has ever happened here on August 13, and this record continued today, as far as I know. Dot went down to Suffolk just in case, but mainly to meet Barbara, with whom she is working on Thinking Skills for Children. I got quite a lot done in her absence, including fetching a prescription, giving a bit of money away and reading an interesting essay on Kafka by Zadie Smith (in the Telegraph Review section). Have been in contact with Flip technical help about my new camcorder, which won’t connect properly to the computer, and it looks as if I’ll be getting a new one. This evening I’ve printed out all the Paston poems on quality paper so that they can be put up on exhibition. Dot continues on her mammoth task of sorting out all our photographs.

I’ve also entered five poems (mainly from the hospital series) in the Aesthetica Competition.

11 August 2008

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After torrential rain on Saturday, we had a warm day on Sunday for our church day out at Mangreen Hall, just outside Norwich. I’d been feeling quite down the day before and woke up feeling distinctly dodgy, but in the end decided to go and immediately felt better. It turned out to be a really good day – relaxing and invigorating – and the company was excellent, as well as the setting. The picture shows Dot playing violin (electric) with Matthew, and the two of them accompanied me singing one of my old songs that I’d updated slightly for the occasion. A good selection of bring-and-share food at lunchtime, and lovely grounds, including a stone circle, to relax in. Took quite a few pictures. The day ended at 5pm, but we spent quite a time chatting to various people before leaving. Home just after 6pm, and it started to rain about five minutes later. Watched Olympics round-up – first UK gold medal from Nicole Cooke in the cycling road race, who proved to be so hyper that she was completely uninterviewable.

Today has been much quieter. Martin Laurance came round to pick up a CD with one of my Paston poems on it for transfer to an A3 acetate. He later came back with the acetate, which I’ll deliver to Lucy tomorrow. I’ve also put together four A4 sheets of Mangreen pictures which look pretty good, I have to say. Well, I don’t have to, but I will.

9 August 2008

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Haven’t seen the family for a nearly a month, and it will be the end of August before we see them again – must be the longest period we’ve been without seeing them. They’re off to Nottingham today and then to France on the 15th. So here’s a picture of us all together at Fred’s caravan at West Runton four weeks ago. Clearly the food was good.

Weather has been a bit up and down this week – the odd thunderstorm and some quite heavy rain, interspersed with warm and calm periods. Like me, really. One minute I feel very positive, the next I’m quite under the weather and suspect something is going wrong with the catheter. Have odd pains here and there, and my stomach isn’t quite right, though it’s much improved. However, in a good moment I decided to carry on living as if nothing was wrong, and I hope to maintain this attitude for at least the next few minutes – and maybe more, as they say in dating ads. Not that I read dating ads, of course.

Andrew seemed to have a good birthday, despite not coming home. I rang him up in the evening, which pleased him, and he was quite bubbly. He got our present and seemed to really like it, and he also got quite a few cards. A friend in Coventry had taken him out for a meal, and The Langleys had made him a cake. Phil has got his car and computer fixed, so quite a good week, sibling-wise. I have been in and around the house, doing some more work on the Paston book for Lucy. Yesterday Dot and I both had our hair cut, and Linda’s partner Mike had a measure-up in the shower room to see what he could offer Dot in the way of shelves, cupboards and surfaces.

Today Dot and I are practising a couple of songs for tomorrow, which is the church day out at Mangeen. I am working on the principle that all will be well, which is an established Norwich attitude originated by Julian, or possibly God.

5 August 2008

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A view of Brancaster beach, which figures in a poem I’ve just written, mainly about the difficult last few days but also a little bit about Brancaster beach.

Yesterday was very quiet: I wasn’t feeling up to much, but I wrote lots of e-mails and spoke to a few people on the phone. Today was busier: I got up reasonably early and walked up to the sorting office to post off Andrew’s card and present. Then Dot and I drove to the garage, where we got a ridiculous estimate for the vandal-created dents on our car: £1500. Pretty straightforward, said the bodyshop man: it just needs a new roof and a new bonnet. Although we’ll only be paying one sixth of this, I still feel indignant.

On we went to Wells and Big Blue Sky, who bought 12 of my poetry books!! Seems likely they would be interested in smaller booklets, too. Had very encouraging conversation with owner, then moved on to Holkham for a sandwich before heading home via the Walsingham Farm Shop. Towards home had violent stomach upset and only just made it. What next? My body should sort itself out.

The weather switched from calm and warm early on to very wet and unpleasant on the way home, but it seems to have reverted to reasonably pleasant again, though with occasional drops of rain. Shortly the Tuesday Gang will appear. Potatoes are baking.

3 August 2008

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Another very old picture – this time of Dot, which must have been taken in late 1971 or early 1972, because she was clearly learning to drive (see the L-plate on our Austin 1100, which I had bought from a second-hand car dealer on the North Circular: our second car). Could have been taken in Wales, in which case I suspect it was on top of the Berwyn Mountain, scene of a well-known UFO sighting featured recently on television, with Dot’s cousin Adrian an impressive interviewee. Or it could have been somewhere else.

Back to the present, and an extraordinary week, as heat gave way to rain. Nothing extraordinary about that, but if you remember I had a urine infection. I had been given tablets for this at Wells, but by Thursday I had reached a stage where my flow had dried up completely. This was bad psychologically (I was instinctively terrified) and physically (it became more and more painful). I tried the urology nurses and the surgery, but couldn’t get through, so we went to the hospital, where coincidentally I had an appointment at the out-patient clinic to get the result of my blood test – to see if my prostate operation was successful.

Despite the urology nurse (who had picked up my message) trying to get me in quickly, the doctor was still about 15 minutes late, and by then I had lost all interest in the blood test. He examined me, made some phone calls and got me into the Emergency Assessment Unit. I just about managed to ask him about my blood test as I left the room, and it was CLEAR – the operation was SUCCESSFUL! But I was in agony.

Dot and I walked to the EAU, and a doctor tried to insert a catheter – unsuccessfully. There was some kind of blockage. Enter my personal saviour – Wayne, a nursing auxiliary. He gave me a mixture of gas and air (usually used for births), which was the only thing that gave me any relief during the next few hours, during which I was transferred to a bed in the EAU ward. They tried morphine and various other tablets, but only the gas worked – on and off. I can’t ever remember being in such distress.

There was talk about an operation the next day, which didn’t do anything for my mental state, but eventually, after some hard praying by Dot, I got an emergency slot at 8pm (the original appointment was at 2.25pm). Never had losing consciousness come as such a relief. I was told later that as soon as this happened the flow was released, and that they went on to stretch my urethra. It certainly feels as if it has been stretched, and my new catheter is less comfortable than the old one. I am due to return to hospital early next week to have it removed – and possibly to learn how to insert one myself if necessary. Don’t like the sound of it much.

I was in hospital overnight, of course, but discharged early the next day – without speaking to a doctor or being told officially what had happened during the operation. But that’s nothing new. I’ve been feeling very fragile since, but went out for a short walk yesterday afternoon.

I’ve spoken to Big Blue Sky and had hoped to take some poetry books out to them on Friday, but of course that had to be postponed. Also postponed is Andrew’s visit to Norwich next week, which is sad as it’s his 60th birthday on Wednesday. I’ve let The Langleys know, but haven’t told him yet, because he’s out a lot. I’m trying again tonight. It will be nice when things get back to normal, if they ever do.

30 July 2008

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Completing the picture started with my last post, this is Birgit’s brother Joe and his wife Ilona, on their visit to our garden last week. Have taken quite a few pictures since then, and no doubt I will catch up in due course.

These stemmed largely from our two-day ruby wedding anniversary visit to the Victoria at Holkham. But before that we renewed our vows in the old church at St Augustine’s – open because it was also the day of the medieval fair. We also supplied the music for the service, after which Annette V had laid on some ruby sparkling wine for a toast, plus petal confetti! She also supplied red roses for the church. I had to make an impromptu speech, which I’m not good at (I need notice of these things), but it was a memorable and lovely occasion. Afterwards we bought a couple of beefburgers from the “medieval” barbecue to keep us going until our celebration meal at Holkham.

We were in the Stone Room, with a huge double bed, and an outlook on to the courtyard, which meant it was quite noisy late in the evening. Because it was so hot, we needed to have the windows open, so I was kept awake by the huge hotel fridge buzzing away outside. Before the meal, however, we walked up into Holkham park and saw some deer. The meal itself was outstanding: I had one of the best steaks I’ve ever had. We also had a glass of champagne each and an excellent bottle of Pinotage. There was also a surprise – a strange coincidence – our friend Stephanie was having a meal there at the same time with some friends. What are the chances of that?

After the high point of the delicious meal, things went rather downhill when I couldn’t sleep, and then the urine infection that had been sort of threatening for over a week (I wasn’t sure that’s what it was) suddenly got so much worse that I had to ring for an appointment at Wells Health Centre on the Monday morning. I saw the nurse (Sam), and she referred me to the doctor, both of whom were really pleasant and concerned. They gave me some antibiotics, which seemed to be making inroads at first, but as I write still haven’t made a huge impact. Dot wanted to go down to Holkham beach and get in the water, and I initially felt well enough for this, though it’s quite a trek. However, we had to rush back prematurely, though Dot did make it into the water.

I then spent quite a bit of time lying on the bed while Dot walked to the local cafe and had a cup of tea. I felt better enough to pop into a couple of the local shops with her, and we then drove into Wells to get some of the famous French’s fish and chips. which were delicious. Surprisingly, I felt much better doing this – and then sitting by the quay reading – than I had done in the hotel room. I felt the antibiotics were working, but the night was really bad, with visit to the loo necessary every hour. (Even worse last night.) Again in the morning and out of bed I felt much better, and after breakfast we drove to Brancaster and spent a couple of delightful hours on the beach. I took some photographs and read, and Dot went into the sea again.

Afterwards we drove home via Holkham Park, which we have earmarked to show to Dave and Julia next year. Magnificently set out; very striking. Then on to Walsingham, where we stocked up in the upmarket farm shop and then had a cup of tea round the corner in some very modern tea rooms: less than £5 for tea and cake for two. There had been thunderstorms overnight, but it had reverted to the same warm and dry weather during the day, though it was a little windier. In the evening the ten-strong Tuesday Group ate in the garden before adjourning upstairs to talk about prayer. Warm and dry again today.

While in Wells and awaiting my health centre appointment we called in at Big Blue Sky, and I left my poetry book for them to consider selling. When we got home there was a call waiting for us expressing interest. I’ve tried to ring back, but unsuccessfully so far.

26 July 2008

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My nephew Joe and his wife Birgit, who came round on Thursday night with Birgit’s brother (also Joe) and his wife Ilona. Very pleasant 40 minutes or so in the garden before they left for Phil and Joy’s. It continues very warm – pleasant in the day, unpleasant at night, and I’ve not been sleeping very well. However, I am generally feeling better.

Thursday afternoon proved a long session at Paston, deciding what goes in the book, but it turned out to be unstressful. Everything we wanted to get in looks as if it’s going in, and we managed to marry up poems and images quite nicely. Today Lucy came round and printed off some acetates. I had thought she was going to do something much more complicated with them, but in the end I could easily have done what she did. In fact, I did. She just happened to be here at the time – after buying the acetates first, of course.

Yesterday, after a really bad night, I was going round in a daze, though getting one or two things done. Phil and Joy came round to use the computer: Phil found a dead Lenton in the Telegraph with Norwich connections, but she is no-one I know. There are far too many Lentons around to keep track of now.

Today, after Lucy did her stuff, Heather Savigny came round with her friend Simon, and we all went to the Coach and Horses round the corner for lunch. Surprisingly good. They came back for coffee/tea afterwards, and I managed not to get in a discussion about climate change with Simon, who works in the carbon reduction industry. He has a good sense of humour, and we had an excellent time.

Tomorrow is our ruby wedding anniversary, and we’ve booked into the Victoria at Holkham for a couple of nights. That’s after renewing our vows at church in the morning. Apparently they run out after 40 years.

24 July 2008

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Rather an embarrassing picture of me on a horse, which must have happened in some sort of alternative reality, otherwise known as the late 1960s. It was unearthed by David in a selection of old slides that I rashly let him take away and examine. The place is Wales – more precisely, Green Lane, Corwen, behind what used to be Dot’s aunt and uncle’s house. The person in control of the horse (clearly not me) is Tish, otherwise known as Julia, one of our lovely bridesmaids, who almost coincidentally, now lives in precisely that house with her sister Gloria. Or she did last time I heard.

This week has been very busy, and I’m feeling extremely tired. I also have a slightly annoying condition (I’m not sure it’s an infection) in the area of the operation, but I’m hoping it will go away rather quickly. It did before. All adds to the tension, though. On Monday I had the blood test that will eventually reveal whether the operation was totally successful. Blood in my right arm proved elusive, but the nurse eventually found it in my left arm, despite the computers all being down.

Tuesday was hectic. Annette R came round and we tried to sort out what was going into the Paston book. This involved a lot of printing out of poems and making of lists. We eventually decided I needed to go out to the workshop yesterday to discuss things further with Caroline and a couple of the poets. So I did, and then we decided I needed to go out there again today, with all the poems (I hope) printed out in the correct font for us on the photographic plates. On the way I’m picking up a book from Jessie which may be of interest to Lucy.

Also on Tuesday Barbara came round to do some work with Dot on their Thinking Skills project. We all had lunch together. In the evening a gang of seven came round, and I cooked chili con carne for them. Towards the end of the evening I felt so tired I almost crept out of the room and up to bed, but I just managed to hang on until the end. Not that I didn’t enjoy it: it was just very tiring.

Yesterday I gave Naomi a lift back to Norwich from Paston, then had lunch at home before walking up into the city to do several errands, including picking up my new reading glasses. Very hot day. I got a bus back. Meanwhile Dot was having lunch with Jessie at Wroxham Barns, and City Care were cutting branches off trees at the end of the road, possibly (or possibly not) in response to an e-mail I’d sent warning about the possibility of more branches falling off and causing damage.

This morning I’ve been finishing off the printing. It’s another warm day, and I leave for Paston in less than an hour.