One of those weeks that catches you unaware, just when everything seems mapped out and organised. On Friday I had paid one of my visits to my aunt Thelma, who is in her 90s and lives at a care home just outside Poringland. She is hard to talk to because she is quite deaf and forgets things you’ve just said. As always, I updated her on the family, including our recent visit to Andrew at the beginning of the month. I think I said he seemed reasonably well.
A couple of hours later I received a phone call from Minster Lodge to say that Andrew had died, after choking and suffering a cardiac arrest. Nothing since then: no-one will answer the phone (except Minster Lodge); so I can’t make any progress. All very sad.
The previous day had been miserable as far as the weather was concerned: thick mist all day, light rain and very grey – just when the days are supposed to be getting longer. Drove to Phil and Joy’s to leave presents. Phil seemed a bit worse, but not drastically so. Joy seems to be shrinking. Afterwards went to Angela’s and had sausage roll and mince pie. Feeling a bit under the weather today – stomach funny. Suspect I may be a little allergic to eggs.
On the way home called at my cousin Mark’s and returned a photo album I’d had since Paul’s funeral. He seemed happy but much older – reminded me of his father. Bridget was here when we got back. Managed to finish the four Parish Pump articles – on St Clare, the patron saint of television; Crick and Watson; the Munich air disaster; and the Columbia shuttle disaster. I am tempted to say NASA are a waste of space, but that would be too funny. Watched football, a documentary on Holkham Hall at Christmas and an Inside No 9 that, unusually, didn’t really work.
Friday, appropriately enough, was dark grey and very wet day. After receiving the news about Andrew I rang Phil and David to let them know. Rest of the day was a bit of a blur, but we went to Morrisons in the afternoon, and in the evening we hosted the Cake and Compline crowd (less Vicky, who is ill) for a Christmas party: David and Bridget, Eleanor, Judy and Claire. Earlier had paid house insurance for Phyllis.
Saturday was cold but mainly bright. A long day. First attempt to contact funeral director failed. Dot walked into the city, and I walked up to Rosary with flowers for parents’ grave, then down Gas Hill and into city, meeting Dot, Kim and her daughter Kavana in Jarrolds, where we all had a glass of Prosecco. Dot bought a long cardigan and got her boots fixed. Walked home. Felt very tired. Cousin Ann rang from Liverpool, and later David FTd – but before that we went to Paul’s for nibbles – Holly and Jo there: really nice kids. Spoke a bit to the Foxes, who are train fanatics; he was Maryta’s doctor. At the end of the evening went to church for midnight communion. Gave Nikki present for her daughter India. Quite a full church: very cold – no heating. Home around 1am. Nice service.
Sunday – Christmas Day! – was cloudy but dry; bit of sun in the afternoon. We went to church at about 11 and helped serve lunch to an extended family from The Lathes, including some very young children. Had some ourselves of course, and it was very good. Carrie did most of the work, assisted by us, Jude and Elaine, from Sprowston, who we didn’t know but who just volunteered. Very nice woman. Good atmosphere all round. Home just after 3pm. Very tired. Opened presents – some excellent books, as well as other things. FaceTimed with David and Oliver – bit tricky because WiFi pretty awful at Caledon. Quite surprised they travelled there, because roads were bad (some closed) in the aftermath of the storm. But of course Chrissy is very experienced in Canadian winters. Watched television quite a bit, including Four Weddings and a Funeral (still brilliant), an episode of Slow Horses (likewise), and the first part of the very last Doc Martin ever. Andrew’s death still doesn’t seem real.
Monday – Boxing Day. Chilly but dry. Didn’t go out. Had the full Christmas dinner, which we cooked between us. Very nice. FaceTimed with David and Chrissy and Amy (Oliver out at gym with Sophie). Also had longish chat with Phil and decided (we thought) on cremation for Andrew. Read quite a bit of Pim book and caught up a bit on emails. Watched end of Doc Martin and Death in Paradise.
Tuesday was not too cold.Dry at first; ran from mid-afternoon. Not getting any further with Andrew. No-one answering phone except Minster Lodge, who said Andrew wanted a Christian burial. So that’s the cremation plan out of the window. Told Phil. Took presents for Vicky (from C&C group) up to Archers so that Bridget could transfer them to Vicky via Janet. Had cup of tea with them; and with David’s mum, who was quite perky.
On the way back tried to call in at Geo Bush funeral director, but no one there. Also called in at Phyllis’s house to check that all was in order, as per insurance demands (every 15 days). Rest of the day mainly watched television and read. Had full-scale Christmas meal in evening again. Watched Detectorists, which was absolutely first class: great script, brilliant ending; and Call the Midwife, which is one of the few dramas that has an idea what Christian love is about. Dot had a very bad night on Monday and was feeling under the weather all day, but this morning (Wednesday) she feels better after we both had a much better night.
Incidentally, I put Andrew’s death on Facebook and received (at the time of writing) 70 sympathetic comments. Aren’t people nice?